Trailer (or) Trash? Twilight: Eclipse, Splice, & Inception

This is a (semi-, or when I feel like it) weekly feature I'm trying out on my blog. I pick several movie trailers making the rounds and review them, based on presentation, my prior knowledge of the production and/or source material, and my pre-existing prejudices against the actors/filmmakers. I am a movie nerd after all. This is TRAILER (or) TRASH?

#1: Twilight: Eclipse



Now, I tried reading the first Twilight book, and I fucking hated it. I also ignored the first two movies because they look like shit.

But I gotta be honest, this one doesn't exactly look terrible. I mean, it will be, for certain, but at least this movie has a semblance of plot. The first two were all like, "I'm super emo so let's look depressed for two hours!" but this one looks like it has some action, some werewolf-on-vampire battles and Dakota Fanning looking like The Omen.

Another thing this movie has going for it? It's directed by David Slade, who also did Hard Candy and 30 Days Of Night. I enjoyed 30 Days on a strictly action/suspense level (the ending was kinda gay.) But it was much better than what I imagine Twilight or New Moon to be like. (I imagine them to be like anal herpes, but worse.)

#2: Splice



I like Adrien Brody. I loved The Darjeeling Limited and enjoyed the King Kong remake. He seems to be attracted to interesting projects, such as this one and Predators.

But this trailer isn't doing much for me. First off, the design of the creature, and the fact that when it grows up it's obviously just a bald chick with a stinger, is boring. A movie like this can go a thousand ways, and this one just wanted to remake Species III.

From all the promo materials, we've seen way too much of the alien. They should have kept that shit under wraps. Maybe the movie will overcome and be good on its own merit? Or maybe the revealing-too-much marketing scheme will murder it?

Dear people advertising Splice, watch the Cloverfield trailers. THAT'S how you turn a mediocre monster movie into a hit: reveal nothing.

#3: Inception



This movie looks fucking incredible. Fresh off the amazing trio of Batman Begins, The Prestige, and The Dark Knight, Christopher Nolan unleashes this brain bomb on us. Well sweet-ass-fudgie-the-whale consider me sold. Between Memento and his last three movies, I would sit and watch "Christopher Nolan Presents: Old People Shitting."

In all honesty, this movie has all the makings of "highest grossing movie of all-time." It's from the director of the movie that's #3 on that list, it's got the star of the movie that's number #2 on that list, and it seems like the kind of mindfuck film (like The Matrix) that you have to see multiple times to really "get."

Here's to hoping you unseat Avatar, Chris. We're rooting for you. The only thing that could work against you are middling-to-poor reviews, and even a couple of those didn't screw Avatar over.